Remember

And I hope years from now you'll realize how much I cared for you

How hard I fell for you

I hope you'll realize how badly I wanted you to want me back

How I hoped that you'd realize that you loved me

I hope you remember how you felt when we first met

Hope you'll have a moment when you realize we were perfect for each other

And that you'll miss me

And that I'll be too busy to make time for you

Like you're too busy for me now

And I hope that when you realize that we're meant to be

That I'm far away and out of reach

I hope you'll have to wait years for me to remember you

And how I wanted you to be mine

I hope you miss me

Like I miss you right now

Hope you remember how sweet and kind I was to you

Hope you realize how much I loved your smile

And how it would leave me frozen where I stood

And that when you would laugh at something that I said

I felt like I could fly

And how when your eyes caught mine

It sent ripples through my spine

And not only did I understand that you were different

But that that was one of my favorite things about you

Remember that in your presence I felt accepted

For the first time, I felt whole

So that years from now

When you have waited for me

Like I will wait for you

I suppose only then

Can we be together

Written by Ariana (wolfwhisperer23)
Date written: 10-13-13

Without Regrets

I think everyone should try and live without regrets.
Yes, you may wish you hadn't done something.
Yeah, maybe you think back and realize now that it was a bad idea, and you wish you had decided that you weren't going to do it.
Sure, you may feel like you'd still know someone or have something that you don't have anymore, if you would have acted or said or done something differently.
But I think that no matter what you do or how you act or how you feel, no matter what; you should never regret anything.
Though I'm not saying you should be careless and crazy and do rash things all the time, either.
If you really think about it, you wouldn't have done what you did if you didn't think it was a good idea at the time.
If you were having fun and enjoying yourself, that is what is important.
When you constantly regret things, it isn't healthy.
You should instead learn from it and then move on.
If you don't except that what is done is done and keep moving forward, you'll never get anywhere.
Having regrets is awful because they keep you stuck in the past, and you end up moving at a snail's pace.
When the things that you've done are in the shape of regrets, they take up space in your mind and they slow you down.
It's like regrets are these weights and you're always pulling them around with you; except unlike real weights, they only make you stronger if you let go of them.


Written by Ariana (wolfwhisperer23)
Date written: 01-07-14

What I Want

The fact is that I don’t need someone; it’s that I want someone.

And I don’t want just anyone.

I want:

Someone who can love me when I need to be loved.

Someone who will hold me when I am afraid and give me the strength so that I can be fearless.

Someone who will not only kiss me when I want to be kissed but who can also be serious and talk about important things with me.

Someone who I trust with my life.

Someone honest; truthful; caring; bright; smart.

Someone who will make me laugh and feel good about myself.

Someone who take me for who I am.

Someone who will show me my worth and bring out my best.

Someone who will care for me when I am sick.

Someone who is not afraid to tease me or tell me when I am wrong.

Someone who will balance me out.

—

Not someone to be my other half.

Because we don’t really need an “other half” and we don’t need someone who will “fix us”.

We need someone that when the two of us unite, we will make an even stronger force than either of us could have ever been alone.

I want someone who will love me even more than I love me; for they will teach me how to love myself more than I could have ever known how to.

Written by Ariana (wolfwhisperer23)
Date Written: 05-19-14

Questions

·    I’m sure most of us remember that as soon as we could talk, our parents and other adults were asking us stupid little questions like; “What color is this?” “What shape is this?” “What kind of animal is that?” “How many fingers am I holding up?” Never getting tired of asking. Always smiling and cooing when we get the answer right.

·    Then once we've learned our colors and shapes, we realize that now is a good time to start asking them all the really complicated questions about life; about everyone and everything. Just to get them back.

·    Then comes that super annoying time when the adults in our lives decide that we don’t know anything at all, and that they’re older so therefore they “just know better”.

·    Next is when all of the sudden they begin to ask us, “Why are you so lazy?” “When are you going to get a job?” “When are you getting your license?” “Where are you going to go to college?” “What are you going to do with your life?”

And lucky for us, that’s just about the time when our brain goes crazy and we’re trying to make all these intense inner decisions, and we ask ourselves, “What do I believe?” “How do I feel about this?” “Why am I here?” “What is my purpose?” “Who are my true friends?” “Why do I feel so alone?” “What do they think of me?” “Why is life so unfair?”

And by the way, when exactly did I sign up for this thing called “life”?

Because I would really like a refund!

Well if I've learned anything, it’s this:

§  That finding yourself only happens once you stop looking.

§  The answer to the universe is that you’re not supposed to know.

§  Don’t try and plan out your life; because life is forever changing.

§  Remember to let go of people who let go of you;

If someone is meant to be in your life, then they will make an effort to be.

§  Lose yourself in something you love; for there is a great deal of freedom in being lost.

§  Always trust yourself.

§  Always love yourself.

And last but not least:

§  Never, ever give up on your dreams; for they may often be your deepest fears, but they will always, always be your greatest companion.


Written by Ariana (wolfwhisperer23)
Date Written: 04-14-14

Golden Lights

Visions of you and I
They fill the air
Sparkle like sunlight
I’m blinded by the bright
Colors like diamonds

I wish I had you to hold
I need your warmth
Though it’s not cold

If you were here I’d see the iridescent light reflected in your eyes
I’d watch the sunshine from the window dance on your flawless skin

The golden sunlight illuminates these white sheets
Casting shadows on our faces

I kiss your lips
You pull me closer
I open my eyes
I see rainbows
I’m crystallized
Frozen from the beauty

Your perfection makes my heart stop beating
I catch my breath
I can’t bear to look at you
Yet I could never look away

You are more gorgeous than all the stars in the sky

I miss you more than the moon misses the sun on those long winter nights

Written by Ariana (wolfwhisperer23)

Daymares and Nightdreams

I sat at my desk and listened to the teacher drone on about the complex and seemingly unimportant details of Algebra. His voice began to sound like background noise. After what felt like a lifetime, the bell finally rang and we all quickly made our way to the cafeteria for lunch.

As I made my way down the line, I received scoops of food as they were dumped unceremoniously onto my plate. Just as I went to grab myself a carton of milk, I heard a voice call out from behind me,

“Hey beautiful, can you grab one for me, too?”

I froze.

My heart beat so fast, I was actually worried that it might explode.

I knew that voice, like I knew the pages of my favorite book, like I knew the letters in the alphabet. I knew that voice like I knew the face that went with it; every detail I’d memorized like a map, knew it far better than I’d ever known my own heart.

Those deep green eyes were doorways into the depths of an evergreen forest, peaceful and breathtaking.

But ‘why?’ was the question playing over and over in my head. “Why was this voice speaking to me?” He’d never spoken to me before, let alone acknowledged my existence.

With tray in hand, I slowly spun around to face the voice’s owner.

When I turned and saw that beautiful face, my breath caught in my throat. I was going to answer him but I thought that if I tried, I might choke on my own lungs instead. His breathtaking eyes were staring straight into mine, but then I noticed that they looked confused.

With overwhelming embarrassment, I realized that his eyes were now occupying the space next to me. Until this very moment, I hadn't been aware of the girl standing directly to my left.

Just then, she bustled past me and without noticing, bumped my tray and knocked it right out of my hands.

I just stood there, unmoving. I didn't so much as flinch as my tray slipped from my fingers and onto the floor.

My eyes continued to follow her as she set the carton of milk onto his tray. Then as I watched, she placed a quick kiss on his perfect lips. She smiled at him and his returning smile was so stunning that it made my head spin. She then took his arm and began to lead him away towards the lunch tables.

To intensify the already heavy blow, just then he turned his head back to see me standing in the mess of what once was my lunch, his eyes filled with worry. I imagined my eyes staring back at him still full of shock and embarrassment.

He, apparently concerned with her reaction at finding him looking at me, quickly turned his dazzling gaze away for the last time.

I felt my fragile heart break and then begin to sink to depths previously unexplored...

* * * * * * * * * *

That night, as I tried to drift off into unconsciousness, I worried that the horrific events of the day would revisit me in my sleep. But instead I was visited by something very different…

I was running through a forest, feeling like I was flying, the trees rushing past me. I looked back and saw a marvelous castle disappearing into the hills behind me. The air was warm, the sky a bright blue. Overwhelmed with happiness and excitement, I felt so free.

Suddenly I came upon an abrupt break in the trees where a beautiful stream lay. I nearly fell in headfirst, but luckily I caught myself and stopped just inches from the water’s edge.

I decided to get drink of water, but just as I bent down to take a sip, I heard the trees rustle behind me. I stood and quickly spun around to look.

“Who’s there?” I called out.

As I watched, a silhouette appeared out of the shadows. At first I was afraid, but then he came into the light and the sun lit up his face and I saw his peaceful smile, and I felt safe. Somehow I knew he wasn't going to hurt me.

That didn't stop me from being surprised though, as soon as I saw his tall and handsome features, I froze; stunned by his beauty.

He was slowly making his way towards me. Cautiously, as though he was afraid I was going to run away at any moment, like a frightened fawn.

The smile on his face was genuine and inviting, it made my heart flutter uncontrollably.

His eyes seemed to sparkle with curiosity and delight. They pierced through me, I felt as though he was looking straight into my heart.

I was still frozen in place; he stopped just a few feet in front of me, and held out his hand.

Still bewildered by his sudden appearance and his graceful charm; I just stared at his hand in confusion and marveled at his flawless skin.

Realizing I wasn't going to move, he reached for my hand instead.

Before I could do anything to react, he placed a soft kiss on the skin of the back of my hand.

He looked even deeper into my eyes and spoke with a voice like silk.

“Are you the princess?” he said with a smile that melted my heart.

I felt myself nod. Apparently, whoever I was at the moment, was a princess.

“I am a prince,” he continued. “I have come a long way looking for you. I went to your kingdom but you were nowhere to be found. Your servant told me where to find you; she thought you might be in these woods.”

“But why have you come for me?” I said in disbelief, still gazing into his beautiful eyes.

“I have heard stories that told of a beautiful princess who lives in these lands. I came to see if they were true. I know now that they were.”

I awoke in a state of blissful happiness, lovely visions of a handsome prince still swimming through my mind.

I didn't have to worry anymore; because I knew that one day my noble prince would come for me.

Written by Ariana (wolfwhisperer23)

Date Written: 10-18-13

What Relationships Should Be About

Relationships are not just about finding someone who you connect with emotionally and physically; but also mentally.

Someone who understands how you look at life, someone you can have deep conversations with, someone who really gets you.

Someone who is like you in enough ways so that you can both communicate on the same level; but is different in enough ways to keep it interesting.

Someone you want to travel the world with.

You have to find the person interesting and fascinating. You both have to want to talk about stuff together every day.

You should feel like you connect in a way that’s different and special; it has to be a mental connection. Your minds should become one. It should feel like you have known them forever.

It’s not just about caring for them and wanting to kiss them and hold them and be with them every minute. You should be interested in the other person’s past, future and present. You should care about where and how they grew up. And who and where they want to be.

You should never run out of things you want to tell the person. It should be about communication; being able to just talk to each other.

You should find it fascinating; the way they think about life.

You should spend every day trying to figure out how their mind works, yet also understand exactly how they think.

If you can talk about life, death, religion, past loves, parents, family; your dreams and future plans, your fears, your favorite things; all the places you've been and your favorite places to go, and all the places you have yet to explore... That’s the kind of relationship that you want.

Written by Ariana (wolfwhisperer23)

Date Written: 05-04-14